Life Prepares You For Death

Born.
Get a pet.
Play with pet.
Pet dies.
Gain perspective on death.
Go to college.
Find true love.
Feel content.
Fall out of love.
Feel empty.
Gain perspective on death.
Find true love again.
Get married.
Have kids.
Buy a pet for kids to teach perspective on death.
Grandmother is ill.
Grandmother passes away.
Gain perspective on death.
Get grandchildren.
Grandfather is ill.
Grandfather passes away.
Gain perspective on death.
Mother is ill.
Mother passes away.
Grasp death.
Father is ill.
Father passes away.
Next in line.
Love is sick.
Love passes away.
First in line.
Fall sick.
Gain perspective on life.
Prepared for death.
Die.

Fun v Funny

We know when activity is fun and when a situation is funny. Now what happens when we try to categorize people based on if they are fun or funny? Wellllllll LETS SEE

Fun:
- Down to hang out and do anything
- Enjoys the moment
- Enjoys the situation no matter how shitty
- Thinks of how to make the situation funner(real word)
- Thinks of new fun things to do, doesn't like routine
- Slightly sheytoon (this is devilish in Farsi, but the Farsi word really captures the meaning)

Funny:
Being funny is a lot harder to categorize. You should know if someone is funny or not. In my mind, the more complex the joke and thought structure, the funnier that person is. The most important part is that just because people laugh at you, it doesn't mean that you are actually funny... you have to make people laugh and not at your own expense.

Combinations:
This is pretty simple but what happens when you have a combination of the two categories? Who in your life is fun but not funny? Who is neither? Think about it... EVERYONE CAN BE CATEGORIZED.

If you are neither, then I am sorry for you. Naturally people will take on one role to be able to survive our social structure and be accepted. Those who overcome the barriers of just being one will rise and be fun and funny. Sometimes though, a funny person may choose to not be fun. It all depends on each pereson's comfort level.

Now what to do with your friends once you have categorized them? Well if we adapt the famous BCG matrix to this argument the answer is simple

Kill the not fun+not funny friends. Simple as that.

Blinding Light

A small tear in the top of the tent, giving enough space for a ray of light to brighten up his eyes. Each day, the Thoughtful Clown plays over the memories of the past. Cheerful plays that bring a smile to his face. In an empty,dark and lonely tent the only thing that brings him a moment of sanity is the ray of light that warms his soul. Years go by, isolated. Without outside disturbance. The Thoughtful Clown perfecting his unbalanced art. Slowly creeping into insanity. Years go by, isolated. Without outside disturbance, content. Then one day, waiting for the ray of light to creep into his tent of insanity, the light doesn't arrive. Confused. The Thoughtful Clown, creeps out of his tent. To his shock, there is no light outside of his tent. The Thoughtful Clown lays outside of his tent waiting for light. Time passes. Starts to search for an answer in the dark. Time passes. Slowly creeping into lunacy. Time passes. He wallows to a standing position. Cleans his makeup. Takes off his costume. Heads East* taking only his burden in search of light.

*In reality its North, but East makes more sense.

Eve of my 25th birthday

Twenty five. Such a mathematically trivial number. There is no beauty in the number twenty five. Just another number like eighteen or thirty four, but some how it represents so much when its tagged along with someones ages. There is nothing special that happens when you turn twenty five. You don't get your first car, you don't get to "break" any more rules. You don't even get a birthday cake anymore. But somehow the twenty fifth birthday holds a lot of weight. I dare say, it might be the prelude to adulthood. For the first time, the pessimistic aura that is associated with growing older is materialized. Having lived through a quarter of your life*. As if death is quickly creeping up. I've always thought this was the secret to growing up, and the death of your youth. The simple realization that there is a promise of death waiting for all of us.

This realization means the world to the enlightened. No longer do we have the luxury of waiting. We can't sample every experience and then if we still haven't found the right flavor, we can still keep seeking. Life becomes less about waiting and more about action. Less about hoping for something and more about pursuit.

A quarter of your life has been lived. Such a simple but powerful statement. I won't sit here and say that I have fully understood this. I hope I will soon. I still won't talk to a girl because of my insecurities. I won't fight for something that I desire to have. I won't utilize my time, to get what I want... or better yet, simply make up my mind about what I want.

Now what does this all mean? How will I live my life? I hope I become more judicious and selfish with my time. I care less about what could happen and rejection. I hope I appreciate my friends and family more. I suck the life out of every second. I don't do something that I don't have a passion for. That when I look back after having lived "half" of my life, I know that I shouldn't be afraid of the future because I have a past that I have been proud of to call wholly mine and a bright future that will do myself justice. I will ward off the pessimism that comes with another notch being added to your body and see the glass as half empty but rather waiting to be filled.

*its quarter of a century and not life, but damn it, I will live to 100

Life in excess

I arrive at my hotel. Greeted with smiles. Check in. 26th floor. Take the elevator. Arrive at my room. I am greeted with a sign that reads "Executive Suite". 

What I am greeted by is the largest hotel room I have ever had the pleasure of opening the door to. A standard bed room. Two queen beds. Large screen TV. But what shocked me was the living room. Nothing amazes me anymore. I think I have done it all. Everything, every location, every person, every pretty face, and every conversation, I feel like I have felt it before and have felt it better than I could ever in the future. But when I saw the living room I was amazed. It was nothing special. A large L shaped couch. A large flat screen TV. A table on the other side. None of which I used or hardly touched during my stay. But still I was amazed. At this moment I realized this was the life I had dreamed of. Not the good life, not the privileged life, but life in excess.

The rest of my stay included have my own office on the 34th floor. Equipped with a C shaped desk, two leather chairs. two walled view, and a small desk with three chairs around it, in case I were to call a meeting. None of which i deserved or let alone needed. It was nice to have it all even if it wasn't meant to be. Going to a restaurant where our dinner cost 70 per head (seventy dollar dinners don't seem a big deal anymore) and of course, having cigars at a cigar bar. All in excess to what I need. 

As I walked back towards my elevator, I see my other companions in the life of excess. I see their glowing smiles. Their carefree attitude about the future and more importantly for me, the carefree atitude towards the present. Blissfully enjoying their life of excess. I remember a time where I didn't know of such a life. There were more nos than yeses. Not in this dream. Everything was a yes. Everything was free.

As I've learned all dreams are temporal. Relish in your temporal dream. Ride the happiness. Live life in excess and forget about the present.

TSP... SEE OTHERS KNOW ABOUT IT

The Circus Manager.

The circus tent raises. The town is filled with curiosity. Wondering what will be inside the tent. What marvels will come. The manager of the circus boasts to the people of the wonders that awaits. Crowds line up for miles and miles. The manager puts on his mask and invites the audience inside his crazy show filled with  wonders of Europe, people from all around the world, music to sooth the ears, shows of fear, sadness, love, and longing. The circus show ends. The crowd leaves. All that is left is the manager and his empty tent, left with only the memories of the show. The manager takes off his mask. Walks alone into his tent. Finally being able to be himself, starts to search for answers in his empty tent. No eyes. No worry. Just his thoughts and longing memory of a cheerful day.

The End of Not Only TSP But of My Youth (I am dramatic)

Song:

Back to Paris:
I take the plane from Valencia to Paris. The plane lands. As the people stand up to get their bags, I swear to god, the first thing this guy does is pop his collar.

Really though, its a leather jacket and its not even cold. Only a Parisian would pop any collar. Go meet Seppy outside of France (hate the RER. Costs 9 Euros to get to Agha Rabbie's place. I could Bolt bus ANYWHERE with that much. I miss how cheap Spain is). Agha Rabbie takes us to my last French lunch where we joke about how the only thing I've learned is cruche d'eau (pitcher of water).

LOOK HOW BIG THE STAKE IS.
Also Frenchies eat French Fries with  everything

This is also where Seppy's uncle gave me the best compliment ever... that I ate like French people... 200 years ago. I felt so cultured. Then Seppy and I decided to go to...

DISNEY LAND. IT WAS SO MUCH FUN. BE JEALOUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Best way to spend the last day in Paris. My flight was at 10:30. So remember how I said I bought a one way ticket. Well my good friend's (Chris dos Santos) dad works for Delta so I buddy passed that. My flight went from Paris to Cin and then to NYC. Now this is all standby so nothing is guaranteed.... but the flights seemed pretty open. Seppy and I head to the airport

This is how we got enough money to go back.

AND THEN THE CRAZIEST THING HAPPEND.
On the train we saw Arya's doppelganger

This made us miss Arya TONS. So sad that he left before I got back from Spain. On the train Seppy said that he loved me (obvs I didn't say it back cause if I did he would stop loving me) and kept saying that he missed me but really its only 5 months. Missing people is for people who are sad. I don't miss, I just am.

We said our good byes and I knew this was the last time I would see him in 5 months. I arrive at the airport. Get my standby ticket. The counter person asks me if I want to pay 40 euros to upgrade to first class. I say sure why not. Pay the extra money (this comes in to play a little bit later and how I hate delta. Never try to upgrade with a buddy pass). I get my boarding pass and go through customs. Feeling all boujie being in the first class line.

Coming to a airport near you. Automated boarder control. So cool.

I get through security and sit there to see if i get on the plane. The flight seemed super opened and tons of first class seats.... wait and get a first class seat. I was sooooo happy. First class on a 10 hour flight is the bossest thing you can think of. I board the flight. Take my seat in first class. Reflect on all the things that happened in Europe. Relax and take in the last few sights of Paris from the air

Song(thank you Dan not Arya):

Wait... thats not what happend:
SO I really didn't get on first class. I didn't even get through security. What happend was that I only got a receipt for my ticket. I had no idea. I was able to convince the people on the line for customs that it was a real ticket (I am so charming) but when it wouldn't scan in the security side... I was screwed. Especially since I had wasted so much time. So I had to go all the way back to the ticket counter to check in, but by that time it was too late.... I had missed my flight.
So I go back to Seppy. We decide to take hipster pictures. I think the most hipster picture of Seppy I have ever taken is

Then we go to meet up with Lillian and her friend Corinna.

Corinna:
I don't have a picture of her but if you had to imagine what she looked like this is how it would be

Corinna lives in Berlin, which is apparently the center of culture now (no). Now what makes Corinna such a hipster.

• Her clothing
• She had a scarf... which she stole from a lost and found. Smelled like smoke.
• She had a belt on that was super skinny and served no practical purpose... didn't even look good
• She was wearing her aunt's sweater that was 40 years old.... her aunt's dead now
• apparently its cool to go into your parents old clothing and find something to wear. Hipsters are so weird... yet cool
• She was from Berlin
• she told me about the different areas of Berlin with hipsters
• Was going to start work at Citi as a banker
• Only because it was ironic

Other than being really really weird she had some good ideas especially regarding immigration.

• Why do you put the people who try to come here in jail
• They're motivated to come into a country and work... make them work. Don't make them go to jail and take up more state funds
• In order to fix healthcare and the old people, make these people work for a euro/ hour.
• Destroy east germany
• Its a waste. There is nothing there.

We talk about all these things, while Sepanta and Lilian talk about bunnies and colored elephants(am I incapable of having a non serious discussion?)

We have Pho

Best pho I've ever had.

The trip back:
So get to airport. The plane is empty. I am like yes... Ill get first class, no. Because of weight bs they put me in coach. I was so pissed even though all of first class was empty. 18 hours later I come back to Atlanta and my European trip ends and real life begins

Song (from the best 4th chapter of any movie saga):

Post Europe Analysis (in hyper bullet points because I think thats the best way to go about the end):

• Contrast between US and Europe
• Europeans are more interesting
• Speak more languages
• Been to more places
• A little bit more adventurous
• More willing to talk to you and learn about what you're about
• Americans seem plain
• I've only been to Cincinnati and Atlanta
• I feel more open in US maybe cause I speak the language and have my phone back
• My phone
• I missed having it (if anyone knows me I love my phone)
• I learned I can live without it and not freak out
• What Ive learned
• How to be more social
• To start a conversation with someone about nothing
• Still don't like it
• French are cold
• Pleasure in pain and thought
• Spanish are passionate
• Just always have emotion about anything
• Guys just want the love
• Germans are mechanical
• Use the word efficient a lot
• Def don't care as much as French or Spanish about love
• Met great people
• Saw a lot of great architecture
• Over all a good experience
• B+, caues didnt get to see everyone i wanted to and see all the places i wanted to see
• I still don't get travel
• People are all the same. Lifes a bore. Blah blah blah :-)
• Place I still want to go
• Rome
• Very historic
• Want to see the buildings
• London
• They speak English
• Such a huge plus
• Berlin
• Land of hipsters
• Marrakesh
• Cheap
• Arabs
• Hind <3
• Naples
• Best pizza 
• Was thee when i was young for green card
• Prague? 
• Everyone says its pretty
• Who wants to come with me?

Blog War Update:
I won. Sorta. I wanted to have more followers than Roshan and Sepanta but I have 34 followers Roshan has 30 and Seppy has 25. I was off but I still have more followers than both of them... and Roshan still hasn't "followed" me. The second thing was that I said I would have more views than Seppy. Well I did this. Currently I have 3742 views in a month(should be up to 4k by the end of all this) while seppy probs has 3300 in about 5 months. Domination. I didn't know this until I got a blogger but it shows you stats of your viewers. Time to share.

But honestly I get excited every time Roshan and Seppy update so if this competition made them post more then I am happy. I think they're blogs are better than mine. Statistics don't mean everything int he world (<- did i just say that?)

Statistics mean EVERYTHING:
Overview:

This is a time line of views during the past month. The peaks are where I posted + whored out my blog on facebook and gmail.

Posts:

Why am I here and why is the name of my blog not f... Dec 12, 2010, 5 comments 121 Pageviews Leather Up! It's going to be legen... wait for it.... Jan 8, 2011, 10 comments 114 Pageviews Ascension to the Heavens where I will claim my thr... Dec 27, 2010, 8 comments 92 Pageviews I can taste victory. I hope its ever lasting... li... Jan 10, 2011, 9 comments 90 Pageviews I went to Strausburg before it got all touristy. Dec 31, 2010, 9 comments 85 Pageviews Brussels is for hypsters. Dec 23, 2010, 7 comments 84 Pageviews OSG... check. Still working on falling out of love... Dec 18, 2010, 10 comments 81 Pageviews New Years in Morocco Jan 6, 2011, 8 comments 79 Pageviews I leave you with a few words of wisdom Dec 14, 2010, 4 comments 78 Pageviews What happens when you cross a smaller Las Vegas wi... Dec 22, 2010, 7 comments 76 Pageviews

Nothing will beat the original post. Leather Up was amazing so its second.

Traffic Sources:

http://lostinfrancenation.blogspot.com/ 28 http://www.facebook.com/l.php?u=http%3A%2F%2Ftspingthrougheurope.blogspot.com%2F&h=54d7a 9 http://pingywebedition.somee.com 8 http://www.facebook.com/l.php?u=http%3A%2F%2Ftspingthrougheurope.blogspot.com%2F&h=0e86c 6 http://www.facebook.com/l.php?u=http%3A%2F%2Ftspingthrougheurope.blogspot.com%2F&h=0d30c 5 http://www.facebook.com/l.php?u=http%3A%2F%2Ftspingthrougheurope.blogspot.com%2F&h=65f44 5 http://www.facebook.com/l.php?u=http%3A%2F%2Ftspingthrougheurope.blogspot.com%2F&h=8eb62 5 http://by158w.bay158.mail.live.com/mail/InboxLight.aspx?n=139824128 4 http://www.facebook.com/l.php?u=http%3A%2F%2Ftspingthrougheurope.blogspot.com%2F&h=31d12 4 http://www.facebook.com/l.php?u=http%3A%2F%2Ftspingthrougheurope.blogspot.com%2F&h=5e374 4

Thank you Seppy. SUCKERRRR

Audience:
This is the best one. It tells you who has been stalking you.

Pageviews by Countries United States 2,261 France 627 Canada 253 Spain 135 Italy 118 Germany 89 Netherlands 56 United Kingdom 36 Switzerland 35 Japan 35

I also I got countries such as Belgium, Iran, Slovenia, UAE, India, Singapore, and I am not sure who else.

I want to know who is Singapore and Slovenia!??!?!?! Also UAE(tara?)?

What i am diong with rest of my life:

• Moving to DC
• Come kick it with me
• Starting a job
• Consulting
• Kind of afraid to do so

Update on goals:

• Have fun with sister
• Done
• Become closer friends with Seppy and not want to kill each other
• Done
• Both still alive
• Well not his blog
• He said he loves me
• See Arya's hipster gear
• Hes so hipster
• So hipster he said he didn't want any pictures of himself in Europe cause only mainstreamers take pictures of themselves while travelling. Travelling is NBD
• Make a short film of my trips and maybe a movie? Although looks unlikely.
• Failed
• Me and Sep had great film idea
• NBA
• It can never be made unless Seppy's heart is broken
• Expand my mind.
• Failed. Ask me about this in person.
• Fall in love and out of love.
• Fell deeper in love and fell even more out of love
• Have great memories
• Took about 1k pictures
• Couch Surf
• Yes and no, knew the person
• OSG
• Kobe!
• Have fun
• Always (other than Amsterdam)

Lies I've told on this blog:

• Arya sorry, no OSG
• Roshan sorry, Arya didn't come
• Arya sorry, no Tatiana
• Everyone sorry, we didnt go to Disney land. we saw Somewhere in the theater. It was bad(Seppy will disagree). Don't see it.
• Barcelona sorry, I just realized my leather jacket was actually not leather :(. My whole post was a fail.

Special thanks:

Thank you all for reading my blog and being supportive. I would thank everyone but honestly its way too many people. I will try though

• Seppy for giving me good stories. Keeping me entertained and helping me out with blog songs
• Roshan, thank you for ideas that I stole from your blog to make my blog. Only did this cause i was intimidate by your blog
• Naz, thanks for harassing me about me posting
• Soroosh, thank you for opening my post, looking at pictures and not reading anyting
• Khaleh, thank you for asking me to update. Love the love
• Nadia R, thank you for editing my post... once. You failed me. English failed me
• Mom, for reading my blog and giving me money
• Ali, for texting me randomly asking me how I was doing
• Arya, for playing along. Jaat khelie bood
• Idin for the boss ass as guide to Barcelona and being an inspiration for my life
• Cvo for reading my blog although you schooling like a boss
• Naseem for putting my blog on her to do list... and reading a few things <3
• Mana for actually reading my blog and not hating too much
• Afsoon for pretending to not care
• I know you care
• Shaudi for following me to get my count up
• Ghavi for reading my shizzle but probs no more izzle
• Pedram for hating on my blog. Its all you know to do
• Beeta for knowing what was going on in my blog. Such good memory OH and for telling me to continue bloggin cause my life is actually intersting
• Taher for finding the craziest thing ever
• I should take your name of the list cause you messed everything up
• Nikita for reading my blog and proving you love me more than Dan
• Dan for telling Roshan you like my blog more
• Nakkisa will get no love cause she has told Seppy that she likes Seppys blog more
• Same with Ramin cause he only skims mine
• Sara MF for reading my blog. SORRY I HAVNT RESPONDDED TO EMAIL. Will do that after this shizzle.
• Sheena for making me excited for DC
• Karim for hating on my but still calling me his hero
• Nima and Reza (they have to be together) for making me think of how to be cheap in life
• Mahtab and Kiyana for putting me over the top in followers count andddddddddd showing me around Madrid
• Yasmin for letting me fall in love with her couch and city
• Melad S for being sneaky
• Melad A for reading my blog
• Raha for her blog, which i read :) although sometimes very confused
• Neda for being possibly my biggest supporter
• Ahmad for loving my food pics
• Tallia for wait you get no thanks until we chase dreams together
• Navid for keeping a blog in Japan and keeping me entertained
• Miriam for being the best Moroccan ever and practically having me write two posts just about her
• Vicky if you read this you get no love cause you messed me up with Mexican
• Lilian for being the coolest german girl I know
• Helen Ho Ho for reading my blog. Didn't know she was dedicated to anything
• Rosa for being my shopping buddy in DC
• If i miss someone, I am sorryyyyyyyyy I really appreciate who ever read any of my blog. Holler back at me

Whats happening to this blog:

Should I keep it? Update once a month? I don't think itll be interesting after. Make a new blog with new name? Maybe its best if I don't then peopel will ask me what I am doing :)

Final words:
Thank you for reading my blog. I love you all. Stay black.

WTF:
Melad: omg  blog time

btw i still dont get the tittle of your blog

 Nima:  so arya was never in europe

you bastard

" How was your trip to Europe? I know if I read your blog I would get all this information but I just don't want to encourage your inflated vanity any more :P:P:P"