TS DM: 2010

Friday, December 31, 2010

I went to Strausburg before it got all touristy.

Song(thank you Sara Mokhtari Fox):

Back to Paris:

Some how Paris seemed like home. I was so happy to come back. There is just something about Paris. It might be the life or the pleasure of being able to pop your collar without everyone assuming youre a douche bag (this is because everyone in Paris is a douche and pops their collar). Which reminds me, there was a French guy in my masters class that used to pop his collar every day (like every day he had a polo and would keep it poped). I used to think you were a douche, but now I understand that you were just Parisian.

Maybe I was so happy because the first metro we got on I saw this

Now, I don't believe in signs but somehow I knew Paris was my city (my is such a strong word).

For Neda I wasn't going to post this but look at what this kid was wearing on the metro:

Looks just like the dad. I've never see so many well dressed kids.

Miriam was in town and she kept begging me to hang out :) so we met up with her and went to Notre Dame and I finally took a picture of it.

The inside is just crazy. I keep saying there is nothing in the US that is like this. Sacre Coeur's inside with its mega jesus still beats ND's inside not because of its size or architecture but when you look at mega jesus you feel like jesus is about to own you (if any of my christian readers which i am sure is no one is offended, I am sorry but mega jesus is cool)

Miriam, I and Hind(?) aka Miriam's cousin

We then wandered the city. Saw an ice skating rink and saw the funniest shit ever. BUT since seppy has the video he will post it. So don't check out his blog, its really not that good. Being good middle easterners, we ended the night with hookah and tea. It was 29euro for hookah and 4 small drinks. Damn Egyptians. I only say this cause I am running kinda low on cash (not really but I write this so i get an email from the parents and being like "OMG ARASH DO YOU NEED MONEY?!??!?!" look at me being shady)

Then we went back chilled for a bit. Realized Miriam never says what she wants and beats around the bush. Then I practiced kissing for new years.

I was going to be in Paris a few days and I had promised Ali's brother that I would go see him in STRAUSBURG. I've also realized that I have gone to Europe and gone to such cities as Brussels, Aachen and now Strausburg. That's how real hipsters do. You probably have never heard of any of those cities. I think Ill go to Tours or Leeds.

I am looking up tickets to go to Strausburg and then my friend Miriam tells me about this great thing called the 1225 card which she has and you pay 50 euro for to show that you are under 25 and discount on your train. She also says the the never check and that I can use hers. I get excited. Something happens and she can't give me hers and I take Seppys. Get a round trip ticket for 84 euro (originally was going to pay 110 euro) and first class each way. So happy.

You can get ID picture taken (sorry for the all the detail but it adds to the story. Oh I am also esfoonie if this helps) in the metro, but its 5 euro for 5 pictures. Its really expensive but I was like meh, I am ballin lets do it. Get my pictures. Get on the train (delayed 2 hours because of this blizzard that has decided to ruin my fun).

Look at how nice first class is.

I am sitting being all boujie. Then after an hour the ticket checker guy comes and takes me ticket. Scans is and is like where is your 1225 card. I am like FUCKKKKK DAMN YOU MIRIAM!!!!!! He checks it then asks for my passport and is like this isnt you (obvs in frenchie accent). I am like FUCKKKK. He's like come with me. So I create an elaborate story about how I was in an rush and mistakingly took Seppys card. Blah blah blah. Not buying it. He's like 200 euro fine. I was like NOOO. i keep talking to him and I am like this is crazy and hes like I will call the cops. I am thinking to myself. I can just run but thats ghetto. I keep talkign to him and hes like 100 euro. I pay the 100 euro. The moral of this story, I've been braking laws in Europe for fun but it might come to an end. GOD SO MAD. I got greedy. Also I think in America I would have gotten away with it. Hate the French.

Trying something new. Instead of songs, I give you cute cats:

STRAUSBURG(sounds like a heavy metal band?):

Get there super late. My hosts are Haniyeh and Amen.

Ali Ehteshami's brother Amin.
Went to UMass Amhearst.
Big ups to my UMass kids. Now hes
getting Masters in Philosophy (I know he'll be poor)
from a school in Boston.

Amin's fiance. Getting a Masters in
photography (yes I got excited.). Speaks French
English and obvs Fobsi.

I have pictures of them on their computers because well they were always on their computers :). Oh getting a Mac Air. Its still a little too thick, but what you going to do.

Haniyeh makes the best sausage ever

Then Amin and I start talking about

Morals - waste of time
Jealousy - shows you care
Better to be older or younger sibling? - Younger

Till 3 AM. Philosophy majors are the best to talk to.

Next day we head to the Strausburg Cathedral which was the worlds tallest building from 1647 to 1874

On our way I see this gem on the wall

Cathedral:

Its huge

Its really well made. Compared to Sacre Couer and ND its more detailed and I would say prettier but its super depressing. Despite that every time I would walk past it, I would be in awe regarding the detail inside and outside

Yes its jesus on top of bones

Again most impressive building I've seen regarding detail but very depressing. Your eyes are drawn to it because of its beauty but it humbles you. I guess thats the whole point. To make you feel insignificant and guilty. Amazing how a building can do that to you. Also it was super dark.

KITTY BREAK:

My first photography lesson:
Haniyeh being a photography master decided to impart to me my first lesson as a me a gifted photographer. The first lesson is why you take pictures, and for me is to preserve memories and good times. She told me that I should

Take a lot of pictures without looking at what I am taking a picture of and from random angles

This will help me see what I like

Take less pictures and be more judicious

Other things learned were

You can tell a persons mood with how they look in pictures
If you take too many pictures people will change and you cant get a good picture of them
You should tell the peron you are taking picture of not to worry about a bad picture, because if its bad youll just delete it to put them at ease
People naturally know their good sides and in pictures they will pose that way. For example some people will only show one side of their face. Two examples are shown below

Sepanta:

As you can see big eyes, tongue sticking out. Looking silly. Its cause hes goofy.

Roshan:

Tilts her fact to 3/4 position. Tongue to the right. The right side of her tongue is her best side. Looking slightly off the camera. This is more because if the camera is on Roshan for too long, she freaks out.

With those lessons, watch out for my super good pictures I will be taking during the rest of my adventure.

Strausburg. Noel capital of the world, but really it wasn't amazing:

Being fobby in front of Xmas tree

So pretty.

Then we went ice skating. Amin and Haniyeh had never gone before so they hugged the sides

While I was sprinting around

I actually thought I was the best there. Which isn't saying much. So I started to get cocky. I dragged my back foot and then fell. My knee started to hurt but nbd. Learned my lesson. Theres a better picture of one side of my body being all white cause the skate rinks here are so bad and its like you are going on snow. We take our battle wounds and go back to the apt and sleep (other things happend but I am going to be less detailed?)

CAT BREAK:

Next day:

Wake up super late go get Lebanese food

I realize I hate Lebanese people and food and throw it up (I am kidding love you Ahmed. I mean Habibi. It was good).

We head to Orangie(?) which is a large park in Strausburg. I walked and Haniyeh used Amin the whole way.

It must be love, or marriage.

On the way there we kept taking pictures.

Look at this picture. Its me taking a picture of Haniyeh taking a picture of Amin taking a picture Haniyeh.

So hipster.

This is how they carry kids in Strausburg

The lake froze over. The cold follows me everywhere.

CAT BREAK:

Things I shouldn't show but I think its the coolest thing ever:
I warn you that one of the pictures below is kinda weird but I think it was the coolest bathroom ever. We go into a bar where they had cassette tapes as decoration

But their bath room was the coolest bath room I had ever seen. It was a Mario theme.

The funny part was the on the guys side, when you closed the door, that was the picture you would look at.

And for the girls it was Mario flicking you off.

SOOOO COOOLLLLLLLLLL

Hokm:

Played

I lost :(

Meet my hokm partner.

Looked just like Natasha. It was scary. Haniyeh
making ash reshteh in the back. I was in heaven. Tea, ash, hookah,
and hokm.

Then out of no where 6 fobs barged in.

And of course the conversation became about watermelons. I was in heaven. I knew I belong there with the fobs. Its what keeps our bond strong. Watermelon.

Last cat break :( :

Going back to Paris:

Next morning 6 AM train. Get back to Paris and I am greeted by ARYA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Monday, December 27, 2010

Ascension to the Heavens where I will claim my throne among Blogger Saints

Prologue:

Many are dead. Many will follow the same path.

Sepanta Mohseni and several of his compatriots have had the audacity to attempt to uproot and destroy my blog, so this post will not be like normal. I need all able friends to click "Follow" on the right and proceed with instructions. Then, refresh the blog page by how many years you've known me x 10 i.e. if we met 4 years ago, then refresh 4 x 10 = 40 = a minute of your time. Please? Pretty please? I'll even give you a watermelon. I recommend everybody do a quick skim (skim and not read because that's all you need) of his blog so that they will understand the new layout/format of this blogpost, as it is meant more or less as a parody. I have come under heavy fire from Sepanta's followers (he has done very well). This will not be a defeat post.

Additionally Roshan has finally updated her blog.There are two reasons why I say this. 1. Because I know if I don't no one will check her blog because.... well no one checks her blog. 2. If anyone can actually get through her post(without skimming and thinking "is she going to write about anything, is she going to write about anything"), I will give you a dollar. I'll admit, I wasn't able to make it. OH and the songs are symbolic. If you don't get it, it wasn't meant for you.

Sepanta and Roshan, suck it.

(but really I love you both. I don't mean any thing I say and I love your blogs. I am your biggest fans and def the person whose visited your blogs the most)
_____________________________________________________________________________

So I am going to make excuses about why I haven't been able to post and how I am really busy with school but really all I do is go out and party and go on my computer and watch Entourage. Talk some about people not believing in me, but really I haven't posted in ages but still don't get why people hate on me. Now the body of my post will be written. It will be just pictures of me doing random things with very vague captions. You won't understand anything or really care about anything.

Aachen soccer team. I have never seen so many offensive and funny names on a team before.

Thats my friend Sepanta and Lilian which we will talk about later in front of a statue. Lol I have no idea why I would post this picture and not even give any back ground.

Seppy's mom's cousin and their new born that we stayed with. They were super nice. But I will just post a picture and not do their hospitality any justice.

Look its a picture of a random dog. I am going to post this cause I think its interesting.

This is when I get lazy. I fell in love. I won't write much about it though. Messi is the greatest. I tried to find couch surf people, but the only person I found was from Brazil so I was like Brah no.

Did this make me seem bitter? I hope not.

SONG:(this goes out to Sep I will start to post better songs)

I have lost the battle but the war still rages:
I will admit. Seppys parody of my blog was really good. BUT Before the did that, his blog was dead, no one read it. No one commented. No one looked at it. After doing a parody of Seppy's blog, I realized how plain his blog used to be. If you know me I take credit for everything, and I will take credit for Seppy actually posting interesting stories.

Onto Regular Programmed Blogging:

We arrive in Aachen. You might be wondering why Aachen. Germany has so many great cities like Berlin, Muenchen etc. I love history and when I heard that Aachen was the location where every Holy Roman Emperor was crowned and the residence of Charlemagne I knew that it was somewhere I had to visit (really Seppy had relatives and we were already in the area so we went to see his relatives.

We arrive and Seppy's friend Lillian (I told you, that you would get to meet her) came to get us.

Lilian was super nice and a great host. She took us to an all you can eat mexican + pizza + pasta place for 8 euros

Germans can't make Mexican food.

With those prices, I knew that I was in love with Aachen. OH YEAH, I was able to order food in German. a little known fact about me is that I took german for 7 years (why did I keep saying 8 years) BUT I basically know nothing as I was able to get away with all with using just Ja oder Nein and online translating services (CVo used it too. I showed it to him. THE SECRET IS OUT). Afterwards we went to a bar and got Sangria to prepare us for Spain (half priced Sangria, Aachen was sooooooo good to us). I have to say that I was surrounded by Germans. We had interesting conversations over topics such as

Should EU allow Turkey to join? - no they are Muslims
BMW or Benz? - Benz
Should foreigners be allowed into a country?- No.
Immigration to the US is hard cause it has a test- No its not. Its super easy.
If there is a bus filled with Catholic school girls going down a hill towards doom and there is a fat guy that you can push in front of the bus that would save the Lilians, but the fat guy would die, would you do it?- No
If you are driving a car thats going down a hill (breaks broken) and is about to kill 5 Catholic school girls in front of you but you can steer the car left into a fat guy and kill him would you?- Yes

I was able to speak German here and there. I was proud of myself. All of my conversations go back to me trying to figure out difference between Country X and AMERIKUH.

We head back to Lilians and kick it there. Lilian reads my blog (she knows French, English, and German and most likely a few random languages here and there). Shes super smart. The funniest thing about her is that when we were talking her music taste she tells us that she likes eminem... and that apparently she learned english from Eminem. The story gets even worse when she read my blog and starts harassing me about how bad my english is (apparently I even spelled Oreo as Orea). This is when I realize that my english is worse than someone that learned english from eminem. Sigh FML. This is almost as bad as the time that a random homeless person mistook me for being homeless.

Lilian also said that she liked my blog more and that she would follow it. Even Seppy's friends are jumping ship.

Early song break but a good remix:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dGXO7BNz7VE

Back to story:

We talk a little more about life and then me and Seppy cuddle that night.

Next day we go to Seppys fams place. If I have learned anything, its that Seppy has a really good family. They're all super nice. Love him. Very hospitable. Even though they just had a child

Cutest kid ever (6 weeks)

They still took the time to feed us and try to entertain us

Amazing breakfast even though they had no time.

I have learned that I am not ready to take care of a kid. I feel bad for Seppy that he's going to have one in the next year.

Christmas market:

This will be mostly just pictures. Got some food. Got some Glueewein. Took my favorite picture I have taken so far. Asked people in German if there is any pork in the food. I FELT SO COOL.

I like carrousels during X-mas. They are cool objects to take pictures of.

Favorite picture so far.

Seppy had to ruin it by being goofy. His flaw. We will get to that later.

In american we have foot longs, in Germany they have half meter longs (really they were HUGE)

The carousel had actual bikes chained to it. It was SOOO ghettoo

Christmas eve (whats the time when it just turns 25th?)

Seppy and I were basically sitting around the whole day cause well outside looked like this

Everything was covered with snow but we decided to walk to the Aachen Cathedral at midnight (still not as cold as Amsterdam).

We go inside sit in the front row (khelie poroo boodim).

Then they start talking in german about the life of jesus. Honestly the place was really small it wasn't that exciting but I got shivers being there. Some of the most powerful men had been crowned there. Oh also the cathedral was one of the original 12 UNESCO world heritage sites . Then about 20 minutes into the thing we get up from the front row and walk out. So bad.

Last song before I ramble:

Aachen was low on adventure but high on discussion:

One of my goals was to get closer to Seppy. Trains and just walking has allowed me to get close to him and shitz. I will give highlights of our discussions.

Preliminary New years resolutions.

Arash - working out

Sepanta - get better at telling stories
Lilian - donate more blood

Appreciate thing when you get older.

There is an age when you realize you have finite time (I might have reached that) and I can't let opportunities pass.
When you're younger you can always just wait till the next thing

I remember in high school if a girl i liked was dating someone i was like, meh theyll break up soon, nbd. NOT NO MORE. If you lose a girl they going to be gone (this is an example but relates to a lot of things)

I love you mom dad grandma aunt naz friends etc etc. I will be more mushy now and will tell people I miss them more and love them more. Not to water it down but because its genuine and I mean it.

A form of game is to have a flaw and an antiflaw

ex: being a tough guy but then in private being emotional and caring about his family and future
Creates confusion and appreciation and understanding which leads to a connection.
Sepanta Flaw and Antiflaw- goofy but deep
Arash's Flaw and Antiflaw - suit but a G

We talked about our past and our family history. Got better understand of Sep and I hope he got a better understanding of mine
Seppy called me his older brother (OMG SO CUTEEEEE). Does this mean that he will do things for me and I don't have to hug him?
What kind of girls we like (according to lilian)

Seppy - Tall. Black hair. Doesn't talk much.
Arash - Short (5'2 to 5'4 but 5'0 to 5'5 is accepted). Black hair. Talks a lot.

I am NOT ready to take care of a kid. I am too selfish and immature. Big ups to Sanaz and Goshtasb for having such a cute kid.

For soroosh (why I am a dirty Persian man):

I look at every ones ass. Recently I don't think i am an ass man anymore. OMG I AM CHANGING

Quote of the trip is brought to you by Sepanta Mohseni when talking about why girls like him as a friend and nothing more:

"I have a few goofy girl friends, buy since they are goofy that's all they are good for. Just like me. OMG."

Exact moment when it happened.

My location and plans:

Back in Paris. Will tell you later about how I love it. Going to go have New Years here (going to be crazy with everything open till 5 am). Officially giong to Barcelona, Madrid, and Valencia.